Turns out the next time you go to take a pill with a glass of water you can pretty much skip the pill. Merely drinking the glass of water will likely cure whatever ails you. So a watershed investigation of America’s drinking water by the Associated Press reveals. 

A vast array of pharmaceuticals — including antibiotics, anti-convulsants, mood stabilizers and sex hormones — have been found in the drinking water supplies of at least 41 million Americans,” according to AP writers.

Which means we already have universal heath care! Politicians can stop flogging the subject and get back to flogging one another. 

The AP found “56 pharmaceuticals or byproducts in treated drinking water, including medicines for pain, infection, high cholesterol, asthma, epilepsy, mental illness and heart problem.” 

You can’t do much better than that for fixing what ails you. Hell, that’s better coverage than the best insurance companies provide! Since when did they cover sexual reassignment drugs? Not the last time I reassigned.

As it turns out, water really is the best thing for a hangover. Acetaminophen and ibuprofin — Tylenol and Advil — are already in the water. Heck with those little hang-over pill packs. Emergen C, too. 

Next time you feel a little something coming on, skip the pharmacy and head to the drinking fountain. Knowing you won’t be denied drug coverage should make you sleep a lot better. Plus, there’s Ambien in the water.