After 6-Way Kidney Transplant, Docs Seek “One Measly Brain” For President Bush

by doglord

A day after six generous organ donors made possible a mix-and-match transplant of multiple kidneys to needy recipients, doctors were seeking donors for another desperately-needed organ transplant — a brain, this time — for the President of the United States.

“His kidneys are cool,” said noted neurosurgeon, Dr. Larry Terry, of Venice Home-Schooled Surgical Guild. “But he’s got s**t for brains.”

Terry expressed frustration at the dearth of brains available for transplants.

“All he needs is one, measly brain — it’s not like we need six kidneys,” Terry said. “Hell, I’d use a pig brain if he weren’t already completely pig-headed.”

While the transplant procedure involves only one donor and one recipient, Terry insists it will be more complicated than the multi-kidney transplant.

“For one, the President’s got his head up his ass,” Terry said. “That may explain his tendency for talking out of his ass, but it’s going to require heavyweight proctologistics.”

For another thing, Bush’s brain cell deficit has been so great so he’s almost totally lost the ability to speak English, his native, and only language.

“It’s one thing if you’re the guy in The Diving Bell and the Butterfly,” Terry insisted. “It’s another thing entirely to wink your way through eight years as the leader of the free world, though God knows he’s tried.”

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This entry was posted on Thursday, April 10th, 2008 at 4:21 am and is filed under Breaking News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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  1. 1 anosila on April 10, 2008 4:55 pm

    yes!

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