3 New Jersey bears scared off by puppy “just harmless hairy gay dudes” on 2627 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

NEW YORK, NY — The three bears reportedly scared from a New Jersey backyard by a cocker spaniel puppy have come forward with a very different account of events. “First off, we’re grown men — albeit really hairy gay ones…”

Man joins Victoria’s Secret thong injury lawsuit, claims thong “hurt my balls” on 2520 2008

by doglord | ˜ 3 Comments »

LOS ANGLES, CA—A day after 52-year-old Los Angeles traffic officer Macrida Patterson filed suit against Victoria’s Secret, claiming a decorative jewel from one of the company’s thongs had shot into her eye, scratching her cornea and causing her to cry out in pain, a California man has joined the lawsuit, claiming the same model thong “really hurt my balls.”

Pentagon Gets Corporate Sponsors, New Name: KBR-Halliburton-Blackwater Center on 2518 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

ARLINGTON, VA—First it was America’s sports stadiums that got corporate make-overs and skyboxes. Now it’s the country’s military installations. A spokesman for the military announced today that the armed forces will soon relocate from their current premises in the Pentagon to cut costs and make way for a make-over by the corporations actually waging the nation’s wars.

Couple caught doing it in confessional told that’s only for priests on 2411 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

CESENA, ITALY — An Italian couple caught having sex in a church confessional during morning Mass have apologized after being told that playing hide the holy cannoli in confessionals is is only for the clergy.

Fox News Calls for “Terrorist Fist Jab” Internment Camps on 2410 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

NEW YORK, NY — A week after correctly guessing that Barak Obama’s celebratory fist bump with his wife after securing the Democratic Party’s nomination for president, was, in fact a “terrorist fist jab,” Fox News is calling for the construction of hundreds of terrorist fist jab interment camps across the U.S.

The Cocky Grow Cockier: Athletes Abuse Viagra on 2410 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

Revelations that famously cocky Roger Clemens — as well as hordes of other professional athletes — regularly used Viagra to enhance onfield performance are roiling the sports world today. And you thought it couldn’t get any harder for the All-Star pitcher.

Obama THAT ONE posters free for the taking! on 238 2008

by doglord | ˜ 4 Comments »

McCain-inspired Obama THAT ONE posters hit the Internet shortly after the debate and they’re yours for the taking!

McCain to hawk speechmaking DVD on 236 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

NEW ORLEANS, LA — Having left audiences nationwide slack-jawed and dumbstruck by his Tuesday night speech before a green backdrop that makes it a snap to superimpose porno on, Republican senator and presidential hopeful John “That Weird Smile” McCain plans to cash in on the buzz he’s created by marketing a speechmaking DVD.

Rep. Rohrbacher’s interrogation-by-panty-hat obsession explained on 236 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

WASH. D.C. — Puzzling many, illustrious conservative congressman Dana Rohrbacher (R-CA) managed to poo-poo panty hat torture eight times Wednesday during House Foreign Affairs Committee hearings on harsh interrogation tactics.

McCain adopts newer slogan: “I’m the white guy” on 235 2008

by doglord | ˜ No Comments »

Days after co-opting the new campaign slogan “A leader we can believe in” from the Obama campaign, the McCain campaign is ditching it for a more concise message: “I’m the white guy.”

keep looking »